30/06/2010

HEALING: A personal example

WOW!
This morning I had a major breakthrough. I’m going to tell you how I:
- overcame a serious personal blockage;
- let go of an inherited fear that was preventing me from feeling great;
- paved the way for a much greater degree of success in my work.


I had been feeling 'out of sorts' for a few weeks now:
  • First of all I haven’t had much work, which means not much money - Eek! A month ago I had an average of six / seven clients a week. The last three weeks I’ve had one or two. If you've ever been self employed, with no one to pay your wages / sick leave / taxes / holidays etc. you'll know what this feels like.
  • Secondly, I’ve been feeling kind of ‘foggy’ – unable to think clearly and unable to put my resolutions into action. In a word: incoherent. For example, I haven't been able to write - even though I’ve been trying to write something every day, nothing has been coming out. Both my blog and my book have been neglected – typical example of writer's block. Every time I tried to write something I felt that it was no good: I didn't have the confidence to publish anything.
  • Thirdly, for the last three days I had a headache. Not a really bad headache – just one of those nagging, dull, annoying pains that just won’t go away; I was even waking up in the middle of the night with it.


All in all, I've been feeling pretty bad! So I knew something was wrong…
The trouble is that when you’re feeling ‘foggy’ and unable to think clearly it’s difficult to get to the bottom of the problem.

Yesterday I fasted on fruit (I plan to write an article on fasting) to clear my head. It worked. I woke up this morning feeling slightly better – headache gone – and decided to immediately work on whatever was causing me these problems.

(Something you need to know before we continue: my wife Petra and I are expecting our first child in November...)

As I felt into the problem, I began to feel something very deep and strong welling up inside me. I realized that I was harboring a deep fear of being a Father. It dawned on me that I felt completely unprepared for this huge undertaking: what if I don’t have what it takes to be a Father? What if I don’t have enough love to give to this new being? What if I cannot support the three of us, financially, emotionally, and spiritually? What if…
I was completely ‘stuck’, paralyzed with fear.

Deep down, I felt unworthy; incapable; and uprepared to be a Father.


Let me be clear: if someone had asked me if I was prepared to be a parent, I would have said yes! Absolutely, I can't wait. I didn't think that I would be a bad Dad. On the contrary, I knew that in many ways I would be a great Father.


But I felt the blockage on a deeply subconscious level.


Now to understand subconscious blockages and the healing of them, here comes the important part:
My higher consciousness was trying to bring this subconscious blockage to my attention so that I could deal with it, and let it go. So what actually happened is that I manifested headache, lack of abundance, and writer’s block in order to make myself stop everything and look deeply at the underlying problem: a subconscious resistance towards the BIG CHANGE that is fast approaching in my life.
Clever huh?!

Now, is it normal to feel apprehensive about being a Father for the first time?
Do other first time parents ‘get the fear’ about suddenly becoming completely responsible for another human being?
Is it ok to be uncertain about the biggest change one can ever face in life?
Absolutely - I’m sure many people go through the same thing! Change is part of life, and sometimes fear of change is also part of the territory.

Are there some people who don't have this fear of being a parent for the first time - I'm sure there are. But I believe that we all, unless we're fully enlightened, have some blockages like this. In fact, I believe that enlightenment is the state of being completely free of these blockages. So as we release them one by one, we gradually come closer and closer to our natural state of being, which is perfect.

Why did I have this particular blockage: well, I believe that the main reason is: my Grandfather died when my Father was just 6 years old: he didn't have a Father himself, and had never learnt 'how to do it'. I was his first child, and he wasn't a confident Dad. In other words, I inherited it from him. (It has been proven scientifically - through epigenetics - that we inherit memory in our cells).

Why did I resist that fear for several weeks and take such a long time to deal with it – well, all I can say is that I’m still learning, and sometimes I find it easier healing other people than I do myself.

To summarize this story:
Having discovered the cause of my problem – a subconscious resistance to the upcoming changes in my life – I released it, relatively quickly and easily (the whole process took about 10 minutes). I simply acknowledged the previously subconscious association between that feeling of 'PARALYSIS' and CHANGE, and it vanished, taking all the fear, self doubt, and confusion with it.
Result: I’m writing again; my head is clear; and I am free from that nagging sense of “I’m not good enough”.
What a wonderful morning!

That’s healing folks: we all have subconscious associations, beliefs, and ideas that hold us back. Sometimes those blockages cause physical problems; sometimes they manifest as emotional or psychological issues – sometimes all three. Whatever the symptoms are, the cause is a lack of coherence due to subconscious blockage.

However, underneath the blockage there is a higher consciousness. That higher consciousness is divine; perfect, all-powerful - it is our essence. All we need to do is let go of the blockage, and let our ‘higher self’ do the rest. It really is easy, fun, and fast. This is a new paradigm for healing:

in the past, healing was thought to be complicated, expensive, and time-consuming. People thought that only ‘gifted’ people; perhaps ‘wounded’ healers, or 'special ones' could do it. It was thought to be something 'magical', or supernatural. But you know what?
Anyone can do it. The technique is simple (you can learn it in a couple of days) and the results are permanent!

It is written that Jesus said:
"...All these things, and greater, you shall do too..."
It seems that Jesus was prophesying a time in which 'normal' people would also be able to perform miracles.
I believe that time is now.



Would you like to learn for yourself how to release blockages and heal?
Do you agree that enlightenment is a state of 'no blockages'?
Can you relate to being nervous about being a first time parent?
Please leave a comment!

4 comments:

Nina said...

Thanks for this post Ben, it's just what I needed to read. I have a similar "problem" which I think also has to do something with change. What happens to me is the following; I know intellectually and from experience what I should be doing, what is right for me, but then I sabotage myself in every possible way, under the pretence of having the perfect conditions. For example; I can only work on something when I have the perfect conditions for it such as the right material, enough time, no disturbances and so on. Even though I find the work I have to do interesting and inspiring, I cannot do it without the inner conflict. Then what usually happens is that I wait until the last moment, when I don't have enough time, and I do the work, and think that it could be done better if I hadn't spend so much time creating the "perfect conditions".
Wow, that was long :) SO, what I'm trying to say is that I would really like to read more about the fear of change and subconscious blockages.

Thanks for the post and have a wonderful day

Ben Ralston said...

Hi Nina, it feels to me as if the blockage you talk about is more about being a perfectionist. Instead of working for the sake of working (you say you enjoy it and feel inspired by it) you focus on the outcome. Perhaps look at why you feel everything needs to be perfect? The work has to be perfect AND the conditions have to be perfect in order to get the perfect work right?! So maybe the conditions are just a good excuse for you as to why you didn't succeed in the perfect work... it could also be that you are afraid of success...
I'll write more about subconscious blockages soon.
Thanks so much for your comment!
With love, Ben

nothingprofound said...

Congratulations on your breakthrough, Ben! I'm sure you're going to be a wonderful Dad

Ben Ralston said...

Thank you NP, I'm sure too :)

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